nov 16

cool cans story--no seriously i wanna know if we beat the record..follow up maybe?

picture of the cards is a little weird on the front i mean i understand it..but still..blur it or something dont just put black bars over it

very nice review of Tempest-a little wordy though..i mean great adjectives and everything but possibly overboard. Great pictures though! Glad they finally worked

this ad about the village with sally..umm makes me laugh

rso of the week--good info, i love santas miracle fund..but i even heard him say that he didnt' want just a picture of him for it..its not about him..get some old pictures from last yaer i know there are some.

interesting tattoo story--front page worthy..idk..

dishes for wishes..yay!!!

i'm glad someone finally interviewed the horse guy at that 441 church..i've always wondered..great story idea!! great story, considering where the info was coming from and on short notice.

i like the name that bobcat art on the sports page..adding some color and spice..nice.

not a big fan of the Q&A format..what happened to bobchat?

Nov 9

Good article on Carmen Bass...did her justice. upbeat but yet very somber and was a good rememberance..
um wow whats up with the runaway b-ball player..crazy
really really like the house ad..high five to mary and christa

like the new cartoons..finally something i actually understand and is funny!

nov 2

airing gcsus dirty laundry-good picture, good story. very interesting and informatitive.
drug busts-random story--it starts out with people stealing food from sodexho..very random, ends better but still random--
registrar- well written and informative. All that stuff is annyoing and i'm glad it got covered.
-i like how we do pictures with info boxes to describe stories we dont cover--they add more color and pictures, which most people look at.
chemistry week-one of the paragraphs starts out--Int he maze uests..thats not my language, even though i can guess it means in the maze guests, ya that needs to be caught. Otherwise i like the article, i saw some of this on campus it looked interesting i wish i had checked it out.
Drought--like the pull quote.
Opinion page--i dont see why my group did a survey on the opinion page when i dont even enjoy reading it myself, i only read it because i have to..because i have to write on this thing about it--the two columnists bore me! You might say i'm just ignorant and dont know anything about politics and you are partly true but still they are boring. The Voice on the other hand i enjoyed greatly, usually do actually. Good points, well written and nicely put! Well done.
Drama, poetry combine for accounts of violence--like the entro, very feature-esk.
Stand has a nice spread, pull quotes, picture headline..nice.
what happened to all the sports pictures..most were taken by austin so i know they were good..but why are they so fuzzy? nice stories though..

October 12

Interesting front page picture..a girl in my spanish class actually said "really, shots on the front page" and i mean the girl is smiling..who smiles while getting a shot?? Good article though, nice open and close--funny close actually. informative
Jumps for both the Leland and Parking are switched.
Oh and one of Lelands quotes was changed or something...doens't work..it might be what she said but aren't you suupposed to fix that stuff if it will make the person look back..and she is the dean of our schooL!
Is it just me or are the pictures kinda blah this week? really just a picture of a banner for zta think pink, and the fair picture is actually really cool looking, but i think people at the fair doing the things that are written about like the concerts, eating, riding the ferris wheell would have been better. Also the parking picture was used like 2 weeks ago.
I like the meet the candidates box. Other than that though, it was kind just ehh..lots of words, what happened to the alternate story forms we were saying were so good last week?
Banned books was a good read, but i think it should have come out the friday of that week..not really that timely.
This article was the one of the frist times i laughed at the cartoon..maybe its just b/c our group had an issue with them this week..but seriously..power issue going on there!
...how come both of the columns were about politics..we are surveying people in our group to see what people are interested in..and yes politics is a big one..but both columnists shouldnt' write about politics the same week.
*if we name our mascot bobby i might cry...
i will say that the features and sports pictures were much better than the news ones..except the potato drop one..get some people!

Oct 5th

Love the head picture--and not just cuz the photographer is my amazing roommate. It has a lot of color and doesn't look posed! The story is also very informative, made me excited about the "den"..i wanna go!

I am so glad an artciel was written on the Grim Reaper, i saw them before my 2 class and it really upset me, there were so many people watching too, it was awesome. I like the campus involvement and i think this was def a story needing to be coverd. It is something that is well written from both sides the Marines and the GR..might have needed a little more input from people supporting the marines though...
Glad to see the Grove ad is gone..oh wait..just moved..its starting to look a lil better though

We need better beat questions..seriously if you saw a man hit a woman?? thats just ridiculous.
NICE letter to the editor..that a way to piss someone off enough to write to us.

Nice pictures and layout for Sylvia, but the headlines of the two articles kinda blend..i know there is a vocab word for that..but i dont remember it..
Why has the litter box been empty lately..aren't we supposed to increase reader response..and the litter box is one of the major things read by students.
Jena 6: i like the article. That is a huge issue lately and I dont know who all is in "the know" of whats been going on, i knew some of the stuff but havent really had time to catch it on the news..so i really like the fact box as well as the article tying GCSU to Jena 6.
Nice Column for corey--but the braves are still better--even if we are done..haha
Maybe for sports we should do like a weekly top player thing--didn't we used to do that? Idk but there was a comment form someone on how much they liked the soccer one the other week..this should be continued! Also i like the Short Stop--i just keep forgetting to mention that in here--its informative adn easy way to get info.
Didn't our class come up with alternate story forms for this energy article...yet it is just text..hmm interesting..
I liked the article on the condom suit of armor..informative and entertaining. I think its a great thing they are doing. Contraversal but good.

Good colonnade this week!

sept 28

the pictures on the front aren't of great quality--kinda dark
Learning Police Procedure was interesting--our cops are crazy..thats alot of arrests

Baggy Pants story-great lead, informative nut graph. "Such bills are already in effect in numerous citites and state legislatures from Louisiana in the deep south, Virginia and to New Jersey up north" awakard and long sentence. In one sentence the major is captilized in the next it is not. They are both after the name. I like the text box!
I dont understand the cartoon..i mean i know we have two separate things..but what?

in the words of my roommate( no literally she just said this) "what is with this picture, i mean what is it anyway (looking at the grove ad) ..we need to fix this!
Great color in the picture of the jugglers-good read to..thats really interesting and a good idea
Nice Picture for Syliva!

For the sports terminology i was kinda expecting something different. LIke a text box or chart or idk something to look at--if i need to know words i want them defined out for me, it made it kinda just blah!

the magnolia ad looks better!

sept 21

I like how in "fraud strikes gcsu" the story is more focused on what can happen, and what goes on during the scam rather than the actual story about the girl. I mean ya its important to know what happened to her, but just having a little info is great!--the check photo is good too! i like the tips, all very good and alternate ideas
Macs-cute headline--yay for our school!! and getting more macs..now i need one! ha
Tyler Flowers--jumbled lead, he's not really an alumni either..we had to write a press release on this for PR writing and he really isn't an alumni until this internship is over with. a little editorial with the description of tyler, thats the writer saying it, not a quote...it should be in a quote from someone, even if the writer knows him. "University TV station." does university need to be captilized “At GCSU, it’s a small enough college to get help and the experience you need,” says Flowers. --i know thats a quote but it doens't sound right! Why is it not till the end that it is explained that he is helping with the stupid human and pet tricks segments of the show, thats interesting and important..up top!! Not a great quote for the ending either, should be more interesting closer!
Anticipating Disappointment-no quotes around a quote, good read though-helpful
Coming home from downtown- wow in your face lead, i like it..haha..drunk frogger!! hehe thats a funny image. i really liked this article, good read, informative, good quotes, and ends well with a dont be stupid line! i woul dhave liked some alternate storie forms with this one, maybe prices of cabs, polls of what people actually do, etc..
nice tennis picture-informative story..the sports stories do their job

Sept 14

great picture of the changed milledgeville! i really like it!!! Decent story too..not amazing.

I really really liked brook's story on Sept 11th!! great read. I love the feature lead..but is that ok to be done? Didn't we talk about having less feature-isc leads for news stories? oh well who cares i really liked it! picture was ..well boring.

the voice was good again, just not compared to last weeks standard. Thats not something to really get people riled up over, the "This is a future we cannot accept" on the otherhand is. great points adn well written. sometimes..i just dont like milledgeville natives because of the way they treat students and i know there are plenty of others like me who would agree and possible respond to that..

umm why didnt' the grove ad change? really?

features had a great layout!! i really enjoyed the "livin for the moment in milledgeville" layout, the story...was ehh alright, just informative but i think thats what it was supposed to be... Pictures, bios and chart are great though!

Good steps in how to become an RSO and this is prob the best way it can be written, but there have been a lot of bolded/bulletted steps/titles in the last 3 articles.

Ok i know the global warming story was a feature story, but honestly i got nothing out of it. I didn't like it from start to finish..sorry, but i didn't. It was just too..idk hypothetical and not believable

Individiuality held ransom-create title, interesting story, but why was he chosen. I mean yes, he is known around campus, but other than looking different what does he do?
The story was very redundant, i think i read at least three different times, that he was known as tony dreaklocks, or the guy known for his dreaklocks..
also some of it was awkwardly written.. "add the fact that he hardly ever wears shoes, carries a cane frequently, sports sunglasses at almost all times, and his signature drealocks, that he just cut recently, combined with such a free spirit, you end up with a unique individual who is just trying to get GCSU students to realize that it's ok to just be yourself."
wow thats long and could be made into several senteces..and frequently is oddly place, as well as the sentence kind of ends with "cut recently" and then starts back with combined with such..just didn't flow...
the intro of "the new coordinator brings big plans" is a little awkward, good but just doesn't flow well.
oh in the GCSU adding y-chromosomes..spelling error in a quote "women mature faster than men, and men do not always KNNOW what they want yet," Pittman said.

some good reads this week, buti can tell that the features are kinda stretching for stories..but i can't think of anything better either..so who am i to critic that..

Colonnade Sept 7

Why was the colonnade soooooooo long this week. I had a hard time getting through it. I understand that the stories on the front page were important news stories...but other than the handgun story they were BOOORRRING!!! Yes the registrar is an important part of our school but if you dont know that then who cares. She seems like a nice lady, but on the front page...idk. The SGA elections on the front page?? I would have moved them inside as well. I think either the mold story (which i'm not gonna lie, kinda bored me too, but still more interesting than sga...who really can't do muhc for the school) or the stress story.
I think there were some printing issues..the spacing of letters on a couple of them were a little off..but i'm sure they weren't like that when sent off to press..like in Kennesaw in the middle of the gun one..that was a really weird one..
The "what do students see in gcsu" was really jumpy, i think it could have been a really good article but they takl about intermurals then jump into all these quotes (that are good) but then jump right back to people coming for intermurals..have some quotes ..or more quotes about intermurals it is going to be talked about so much...great picture for that though
the our voice was amazing..i really enjoyed it. GREAT read..why can't all the stories be that great of a read??
HAIRSPRAY?? really??? ok old news..and not that great for old news..this article might have been good when hairspray came out but if youre going to have an article about a movie..how about a current one!?!?!
I liked the stress article..but there were several things that were a little off. There was an inconsistency in titles..not like fact checking titles just copy.. Is it Junior English major, tim taylor, Freshman Business major mike myers, or is it Senior exercise science major (no caps?)...all before the title..to have more than one way is one thing, but with one being wrong is bad...also, the sources for this article were good..but they were all guys! Girls get stressed too!?!! heck i've been out of my mind lately.. :)
I want free rent!! Cool story..bad ending... A survey asking students what tehy think about The Village is in the works and soon will be unveiled soon./ Williams cannot wait to join the other students at west campus.
how bout...Williams is excited about moving to The Village. (then) A survey asking students...

oh and if i hadn't moved out of the Grove to Magnolia b/c the GROVE Sucks!! i would def move there..their add kicks butt compared to magnolias..maybe i need to go work for my apartment..ha

someone voted already!!!!!! :)

Colonnade Aug 31

Overall i think the paper was really good this week. Well put together, the stories were a good read and the design and pictures were good. I think the article on John Bruner was really good. Devin did a good job of being sensitive to the subject but still getting the news out there.
I really enjoyed the features this week. The picture of the theater is amazing..great photography, the story was very informative and entertaining as well. I really like the closing paragraph in it! Good job!
The graphic on the "students fight high temperatures was great! i like that its in a health box! Good idea! The interview/review of Corey Smith was really goood. It wasn't your normal review...liked it!
The picture on the "Players plot murder, comedy" is really fuzzy..idk if it was the printing or the actualy photo, but its not good quality.
Good quotes in the Flag Football article, but there is a date wrong there. It is a little confusing, it says they met on wednesday, august 31...have they already met? did they met last wed, or will they be meeting next wed? and the 31 is friday..not even a wednesday!

oh and the ad about the polls in the colonnade is amazing!! haha..well it will be even more amazing when i get the polls set up..ha

Missing the Big Picture

After reading, "Do Big Pictures Miss the Big Picture" and looking in our newspaper design book, there are def. many aspects of The Telegraph's layout that aren't the standard. our book has three design goals, two of which are not taken into consideration for this article.
I agree with Jackson in that big articles need big pictures if they are available. And this picture and this article are very important to the people of Macon/Middle Ga. b/c their kids/neighbors/friends are heading to the world series. Thats a big deal. And this picture captures the teams excitement prefectly! But...I dont think they should have put the picture of the mothers/fans above the already large picture of the boys, also there shouldn't be another story, of Lindsely Lohan none the less, right next to the large picture. One of the rules from the design book is "avoid confusion with any other story parked beisde the photo."
Once you get past the main story of the little league team there are a bunch of little exerpts from other stories, its a little confusing.
I think the paper accomplished their goal in making this story the most eye catching, but it loses a little interest in the confusion below the article. In all of the examples Jackson gave in his critique he shows front pages with only ONE large photo and he is critical of it, I think if he had seen this one, he might have been driven mad. There are several pictures and six different stories all on the front page. Yes, all six may be important but if their goal was to showcase the little leaguers so much, then the number of pictures and articles should have been limited.

Let us now praise editors

So this started out more about editors than writers, and ended more about writers having confidence in themselves to allow editors to edit. That confidence is something I usaually lack quite a bit. Even when I am proud of a piece I don't even like my friends to read it, let alone someone who will possibly rip it apart.
As much as I might have enjoyed peer editing the last class, I still go through something very much like Kamiya described...the whole having my internal organs moved around, ya, thats about how it feels as you turn in a paper to be edited or even worse, graded, by a teacher or read by a peer.
No, all editors aren't the "bullies, ignoramuses or diggers" as described, some of them actually do provide insight, help, and encouragment along with their critisim. And I think that was the point Kamiya was trying to make, and did make. Writers do need to have more confidence in their work and be able to hand it off to an editor or peer to be looked over and checked. At the same time though, editors do need to have a check on themselves, need to make sure they dont try to become the power hungry, "I'm going to make this better" (and end up changing the meaning) fearful people, that they know they can be.
It is hard to look at both perspectives, as Kamiya said in the beginning, but I think having done both, writing and editing, he did pull a lot together about the two that are true for each. Something, I as a college student learning to do both of these tasks, should take into consideration when I write and edit.